Sex on the Net IX

The Sex on the Net series continues with another installment of short but interesting sex-related news stories.

The Family Man

Shahadeh Abu Arrar has given new meaning to the term "family man." Abu Arrar, 58, is a member of Israel's impoverished Bedouin Arab community. In a traditional society where men commonly have several wives and many children, Abu Arrar is exceptional. He has 8 wives and 67 children! But he is not yet finished. Abu Arrar, whose oldest child is 37, is considering marrying again.

"I'm thinking about a new wife, No. 9," he told the Israeli daily Yediot Ahronot in a recent interview. "There are many women who wish to marry me and there is no lack of women. I never had a problem with such things."

While Islam allows Muslim men to have four co-wives, it is a custom in Bedouin society to flout the already-generous ruling - and an Israeli ban on polygamy - by marrying women one at a time, divorcing them and marrying others, experts on Bedouin culture said. Culturally, it's understood that the renounced wives are still married to Abu Arrar, the experts said. "My first wife is my age, and today I hardly spend any time with her. Her children are big, and I leave her alone. I have younger wives to spend time with. Every night I decide which wife to be with."

Abu Arrar claims to remember all his children's names, and says they are split almost evenly between boys and girls. According to the Israeli Interior Ministry, Abu Arrar has 53 children registered as Israeli citizens. He has 14 other children born to Palestinian wives in the West Bank and who are not eligible for Israeli citizenship, his other wives said.

It's unclear how Abu Arrar supports his massive family. Camels, goats and a cow were grazing on his property. Yediot said he also receives about $1,700 in government handouts each month. Can you imagine the size of his dinner table??? Maybe somebody should tell him about condoms???

Size Does Matter

According to Frank Sadlo, founder of TheyFit, which makes what he claims are the world's first custom-fit condoms, size really does matter. Widths vary but condom length is usually standard, as it is believed latex can stretch to fit all men. The average adult penis is 5-6 inches long, experts said. Sadlo said his inspiration for custom condoms arose from his days playing baseball at the University of Louisville in Kentucky, where locker room tales of exploits with the opposite sex often failed to include use of condoms due to complaints they did not fit.A more comfortable condom contributes to men actually using them, said Michael Reece, director of the Center for Sexual Health Promotion at Indiana University.

"Typically, when a man complains about condom fit, we have assumed that he means that condoms are too small and we have often just ignored this complaint because we think that men are bragging about the size of their penis" Reece said

He said men also have problems with condoms being too large. "It is time for those who establish condom manufacturing standards to consider whether an expanded range of condom sizes is necessary," Reece said. When given a choice, Frank Sadlo said many men prefer condoms smaller than the standard minimum 6.3 inches long, with more than half ordering those less than 5.12 inches.

Sadlo offers a "fit kit," a sheet of paper printed from a computer for sizing — and advising the user to watch out for paper cuts. The chart only runs from long to longer. The product was offered from 2003-2006 in the United States before he withdrew it to upgrade from 55 to 95 sizes. Changing international standard would make it easier to widely offer the product, rather than seeking approval in each country. Sadlo said it has been difficult to transform the condom industry.

Sadlo was at a meeting of delegates from 21 countries under the Geneva-based International Organization for Standardization. At the session in Seogwipo on South Korea's Jeju Island, more than 100 representatives — including leading manufacturers, government standards bodies and aid groups — pored over 42 pages of specifications and testing requirements for condoms. Maybe if Sadlo tried a little harder he could get the delegate to adopt his motto: Size Does Matter!

Genitalia Piercing

What is a 39-year-old mother to do when she discovers that her 13-year-old daughter has been having sex...... and one of her partners was the mother's boyfriend? Well one such mother came up with a solution: Shave her head and of course pierce her genitalia. The girl testified in court at her mother's child abuse trial.

The girl, now 16, told jurors that her mother asked a tattoo artist friend in 2004 to shave the girl's head to make her unattractive to boys and later held her down for the piercing.

"She was trying to protect me, but it hurt me," the girl testified. "It not only hurt me physically, but it hurt me mentally. ... That's emotionally scarring. That's physical abuse."

Defense attorney Donald Day told jurors that the mother had trouble with her rebellious daughter and that the girl agreed to the piercing to help rebuild her mother's trust.

"It wasn't torture or extreme violence," Day said. "It was, in the young girl's words, to try to save her. ... That decision was a last-ditch effort. In my client's mind, she had no other options."

Child welfare officials were called after the girl became infected from the piercing. The mother, whose name is being withheld to protect her daughter's identity, is charged with two counts of aggravated child abuse and faces up to 30 years in prison if convicted. Tammy Meredith, 43, who did the piercing in her home, was sentenced to a year in jail for her role. An arrest warrant has been issued for the mother's boyfriend on allegations he had sex with the girl.

Ping Pong "Special"

If your teenage son has taken up ping pong after school and he attends Pace HS in Manhattan, it is time to worry. Teens at Pace HS were getting their sex education outside the classroom after being targeted by pimps who lured them to a nearby brothel and enticed them with cut-rate romps, law-enforcement sources said. The brothel, at 39 Eldridge St., was recently shut down by NYPD vice cops following complaints from outraged parents who learned that their sons were targeted by the sleazy operators, the sources said.

Police sources said that a ping pong hall was a front for the whorehouse in the back of the establishment, and that it was run by Benjie Zheng, 47, who lived a few blocks away, and Ming Liuchang, 48, of Queens. The men would try to lure students to the Robo-Pong Training Center by distributing business cards outside the school, sources said. The cards were printed only with a contact number, an image of a topless woman - and a word, "Good."

The men were arrested in a Sept. 18 sting operation, along with two suspected prostitutes and Heng Yu Ye, 46, who owned the ping pong parlor. The alleged cathouse was shuttered for good after the bust. Two undercover detectives paid cash after Zheng told them:

"You can pick any of these girls for sex, and it will cost you $35,"

Investigators allege that over the past month, the owners drummed up business by hawking their services directly in front of the school. Those who called the business-card number were given the address and upon arriving, allegedly paid fees ranging from $35 to $60 in exchange for a playing card that served as a chit for sexual services in secret back rooms.

"It doesn't surprise me. There are guys handing out cards with naked girls on them all the time around here," said Ivy Lee, a senior at Pace HS.

The rates were apparently designed to attract students who might not have wanted to wait until prom night.

"It was obvious that they were targeting young students, because the prices were so low," said one disgusted police official, adding, "Most brothels charge at least $100."

R.I.P. Lucky Dube 1964-2007

Like Bob Marley and Peter Tosh, the voice and talent of reggae superstar Lucky Dube, 43, has been silenced. He was killed Oct. 18 2007 in Johannesburg, South Africa in an attempted carjacking. Like Bob Marley and Peter Tosh, Lucky Dube will live on through his music. He was South Africa's greatest reggae musician. In a career spanning 25 years, he produced 22 recorded albums in Zulu, English and Afrikaans. He leaves behind his wife (Zanele), seven children (Bongi, Nonkulueko, Thokozani, Laura, Siyanda, Philani and three-month-old baby Melokuhle), and millions of fans all over the world.

His songs centred on messages in three main areas-political, social, and personal issues. Lucky's music is riddled with the desire to make the world a better place for everybody. He hated injustice, oppression, tyranny and exploitation. His abhorrence of racism, tribalism and corruption were reflected in his songs.

Lucky Dube was shot three times and died as his car struck a tree after a botched hijacking. He was dropping his son and teenage daughter at his brother’s Rosettenville, Johannesburg home on Thursday night, October 18. His death put the spotlight on crime and violence in South Africa. It has one of the highest crime rates in the world, recording an average of 50 murders each day. U.N. crime statistics say one in three Johannesburg residents has been robbed. Rapes and assaults also are common. Lucky expressed concern about violence in his country in a song written 1999, titled "Crime and Corruption" the words of which seem to be so prophetic: "Do you ever worry about leaving home and coming back in a coffin, with a bullet through your head?"
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BOaeqzJZROo]

Four men have been arrested and charged with the murder. Sifiso Mlanga and Julius Gxowa from Mozambique, and Thabo Maruping and Mbuti Mabe from South African. The accused appeared briefly before Magistrate A Roux in Johannesburg yesterday. They face charges of murder, attempted hijacking and possession of an unlicensed firearm and ammunition. One had covered his head with a towel and the others had hoods pulled over their faces. They removed these once they turned their backs to the overcrowded gallery and faced the magistrate. The case was postponed until October 30 for their applications for legal aid to be processed. When they returned to the cells, they covered their faces again – an action met by howls of protest from the gallery.

Meanwhile, Dube‘s family said members of the public and journalists would be welcome to attend his funeral service at Farmers Hall in Newcastle. They, however, wanted the burial to take place in private.

Lucky Dube in Concert

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VY9V6pobYhY]

Lucky Dube - In Strong Memory

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Cy5_9jwBVY]

Lucky Dube - A Tribute

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RsAO1w59wGc]

Pedophiles in the School System

Suspected pedophile Christopher Paul Neil, 32, was a regular poster to an online forum for teachers (Korean Job Discussion Forums) and he posted more than 300 messages under the pseudonym "Peter Jackson." In one instance cited, Jackson allegedly discussed how to delay or skirt police background checks needed for some teaching jobs.

"Police checks are NOT needed to get a visa. Public schools will want one, but you should be able to stall them. Often they want teachers SO quickly that they will 'wait' for some things. I never gave a police check for my last public school job. I was in Vietnam at the time, and getting one wasn't easy. I delayed and never heard about it again."

Neil, a Canadian national, had worked in the school systems of Thailand, South Korea and Vietnam since 2000. Previously he worked in Catholic schools as a volunteer instructor and substitute teacher in various parts of British Columbia, Canada. Neil had much experience in the school systems of Canada and Asia. He was arrested in Thailand accused of having sex with a dozen different boys between the ages of 6 and 12.

Investigations into sex offenses by educators in the American school system show that there is a systemic problem in dealing with these individuals. One report mandated by Congress estimated that as many as 4.5 million students, out of roughly 50 million in American schools, are subject to sexual misconduct by an employee of a school sometime between kindergarten and 12th grade. That figure includes verbal harassment that's sexual in nature.

"From my own experience — this could get me in trouble — I think every single school district in the nation has at least one perpetrator. At least one," says Mary Jo McGrath, a California lawyer who has spent 30 years investigating abuse and misconduct in schools. "It doesn't matter if it's urban or rural or suburban."

A seven month investigation by the Associated Press found that between 2001 and 2005, more than 2,500 educators were disciplined for sexual misconduct. This however does not tell the full story. Most of the abuse never gets reported. Those cases reported often end with no action. Cases investigated sometimes can't be proven, and many abusers have several victims. And no one — not the schools, not the courts, not the state or federal governments — has found a surefire way to keep molesting teachers out of classrooms. The overwhelming majority of cases involved teachers in public schools. Private school teachers rarely turn up because many are not required to have a teaching license and, even when they have one, disciplinary actions are typically handled within the school.

The investigation also found efforts to stop individual offenders but, overall, a deeply entrenched resistance toward recognizing and fighting abuse. It starts in school hallways, where fellow teachers look away or feel powerless to help. School administrators make behind-the-scenes deals to avoid lawsuits and other trouble. And in state capitals and Congress, lawmakers shy from tough state punishments or any cohesive national policy for fear of disparaging a vital profession. That only enables rogue teachers, and puts kids who aren't likely to be believed in a tough spot.

Take the case of Jennah Bramow. As an 8-year-old she was molested by her elementary school teacher Gary C. Lindsey:

The young teacher hung his head, avoiding eye contact. Yes, he had touched a fifth-grader's breast during recess. "I guess it was just lust of the flesh," he told his boss. That got Gary C. Lindsey fired from his first teaching job in Oelwein, Iowa. But it didn't end his career. He taught for decades in Illinois and Iowa, fending off at least a half-dozen more abuse accusations.

When he finally surrendered his teaching license in 2004 — 40 years after that first little girl came forward — it wasn't a principal or a state agency that ended his career. It was one persistent victim - Jennah Bramow - and her parents.

As an 8-year-old elementary-school student, Bramow told how Lindsey forced her hand on what she called his "pee-pee."

"How did you know it was his pee-pee?" an interviewer at St. Luke's Child Protection Center in Cedar Rapids asked Jennah in a videotape, taken in 1995.

"'Cause I felt something?" said Jennah, then a fidgety girl with long, dark hair.

"How did it feel?" the investigator asked.

"Bumpy," Jennah replied. She drew a picture that showed how Lindsey made her touch him on the zipper area of his pants.

Lindsey, now 68, refused multiple requests for an interview. "It never occurs to you people that some people don't want their past opened back up," he said when an AP reporter approached him at his home outside Cedar Rapids and asked questions.

That past, according to evidence presented in the Bramow's civil case, included accusations from students and parents along with reprimands from principals that were filed away, explained away and ultimately ignored until 1995, when accusations from Bramow and two other girls forced his early retirement. Even then, he kept his teaching license until the Bramows took the case public and filed a complaint with the state.....it was 40 years after his first conviction (and many more abuses later) that he lost his license to teach!

Like Lindsey, the perpetrators that the AP found are everyday educators — teachers, school psychologists, principals and superintendents among them. They're often popular and recognized for excellence and, in nearly nine out of 10 cases, they're male. While some abused students in school, others were cited for sexual misconduct after hours that didn't necessarily involve a kid from their classes, such as viewing or distributing child pornography.

They include:

— Joseph E. Hayes, a former principal in East St. Louis, Ill. DNA evidence in a civil case determined that he impregnated a 14-year-old student. Never charged criminally, his license was suspended in 2003. He has ignored an order to surrender it permanently.

— Donald M. Landrum, a high school teacher in Polk County, N.C. His bosses warned him not to meet with female students behind closed doors. They put a glass window in his office door, but Landrum papered over it. Police later found pornography and condoms in his office and alleged that he was about to have sex with a female student. His license was revoked in 2005.

— Rebecca A. Boicelli, a former teacher in Redwood City, Calif. She conceived a child with a 16-year-old former student then went on maternity leave in 2004 while police investigated. She was hired to teach in a nearby school district; board members said police hadn't told them about the investigation.

The abuse itself is one thing but the after effects on the child can be long term. Sometimes the abuse is reported long after the crime occurred as in the case of an 11-year-old girl who didn't tell her parents about being sexually abused by her music teacher, Robert Sperlik Jr., until she was 15-years-old. At the time she and some of her friends wrote a note to a teacher complaining about him . The teacher investigated, spoke to Sperlik, some of the parents, and decided nothing inappropriate happened. It wasn't until her mother got the entire story from the girl - four years later -that Robert Sperlik Jr. was arrested, convicted and sentenced to a 20-year prison term.

However, having to go through a grueling trial, was more than the girl could bear and eventually she was admitted to a psychiatric hospital after she took sleeping pills. She was upset that Sperlik hadn't gotten more prison time. After coming home they found her a counselor who specializes in sexual abuse. She is mending slowly. Her father found a book she had been reading and read a passage that she had underlined:

"You forget some things, don't you," it reads. "Yes. You forget what you want to remember and you remember what you want to forget."

Please read the full story here

Two of the nation's major teachers unions, the American Federation of Teachers and the National Education Association, each denounced sex abuse while emphasizing that educators' rights also must be taken into account.

"Students must be protected from sexual predators and abuse, and teachers must be protected from false accusations," said NEA President Reg Weaver, who refused to be interviewed and instead released a two-paragraph statement.

The real problem is how do we identify pedophiles, not just in the school system but in society in general, and quickly remove them from any environment where they can come into contact and abuse the most vulnerable ones among us - The children.

Mona "The Hammer" Shaw vs Sub-Moronic Imbeciles

Mona Shaw 75, seems to be a nice lady. She lives in a nice house in Bristow, Virginia with her husband of 45 years, Don. They are both retired from the Air Force. She is secretary of the local AARP, secretary of a square-dancing club and takes in strays for the local animal shelter (they have seven dogs at the moment). She has a heart condition. She lifts weights at a local gym. The couple attend a Unitarian Universalist church. All in all she seems to be enjoying her retirement. That is until she decided to sign up for her local cable company's (Comcast) "Triple Play" service, which combines phone, cable and Internet services.

Little did she, or anyone else, know that she was about to become the spokeswoman for all disgruntled people who have suffered at the hands of a behemoth bureaucracy whose very name is an oxymoron - Customer Service.

Mona called Comcast and scheduled a day for them to come out and install their "Triple Play" service. Comcast did not show up on that day, a Monday. They came two days later but left with the job half done. On Friday Comcast cut off all service. That same Friday Mona and her husband Don went down to the local call center office to complain.

Mona demands to speak to a manager. A customer service representative says someone will be right with them. Directs them to a bench, outside. (Remember, it's mid-August.) Mona and Don sit. After two hours have gone by they are still sitting and waiting. Finally the customer rep leans out the door and says the manager has left for the day. Thanks for coming!

Mona was livid! The insulting idea that, as Shaw puts it, "they thought just because we're old enough to get Social Security that we lack both brains and backbone."

So, after stewing over it all weekend, on the following Monday, she went downstairs, got Don's claw hammer and said: "C'mon, honey, we're going to Comcast."

(It should be noted right now that what followed next was a totally inappropriate (albeit satisfying!) way of settling a dispute with Customer Service.)

Look out!! It's Hammer Woman, avenger of oppressed cable subscribers everywhere!

Hammer time: Shaw storms in the company's office. BAM! She whacks the keyboard of the customer service rep. BAM! Down goes the monitor. BAM! She totals the telephone. People scatter, scream, cops show up and what does she do? POW! A parting shot to the phone!

"They cuffed me right then," she says.

Her take on Comcast: "What a bunch of sub-moronic imbeciles."

"I scared the tar out of some people, at least," she says. "It had never occurred to me to take a hammer to a phone company before, but I was just so upset. . . . After I hit the keyboard, I turned to this blonde who had been there the previous Friday, the one who told me to wait for the manager, and I said, ' Now do I have your attention?' "
"My blood pressure went up around my ears. I started hyperventilating. They had to call the rescue squad and put me on a litter."

By the time it was over, she recalls, there were an ambulance, two police cruisers and a sergeant's car in the parking lot. Shaw received a three-month suspended sentence for disorderly conduct, a $345 fine in restitution and a year-long restraining order barring her from the Comcast office.

She does, however, finally, have phone service...........On Verizon!!

Pedophile caught in Thailand

Christopher Paul Neil, 32, was arrested by Thai police just 8 days after entering the country on a flight from Seoul, South Korea. He is accused of sexually abusing dozens of Asian boys, aged 6 to 12 years old, mostly from Cambodia and Vietnam. His capture was the result of an unprecedented appeal from Interpol to the public seeking to determine his identity.

It was three years ago that German police came across about two hundred internet photos of a man abusing young Asian boys. His face had been digitally altered to hide his identity. Recently they were able to reverse engineer the pictures to uncover his face. His photo was then published around the world by Interpol asking for help in finding out who he was. With the help of hundreds of tips from people they were able to identify him as Christopher Paul Neil, 32, a Canadian who taught at schools in at least three Asian countries — South Korea, Thailand and Vietnam. Before teaching, he had worked as a chaplain in Canada, counseling teens.

Neil was caught on camera at the immigration counter at Bangkok's international airport. The Thai police began searching for him and tracked him to a house in Nakhon Ratchasima province that he shared with a Thai transvestite friend whose phone calls were traced by authorities. Neil surrendered peacefully.

"I think he knew we were coming," said police Col. Paisal Luesomboon, who was on the five-member police team that made the arrest. "He knew that there was an arrest warrant issued and that his face was posted everywhere."

Neil was charged with detention of a child under 15 without parental consent, punishable by up to three years in prison; taking a child under 15 from his parents without consent, punishable by five to 20 years; and sexual abuse of a child under 15, punishable by up to 10 years.

A judge in the Bangkok Criminal Court signed a police order Saturday to extend his detention to 12 days, and could move later to keep him behind bars up to 84 days. After the brief hearing, Neil was incarcerated at the Bangkok Remand Prison. Maj. Gen. Wimol Pao-in, chief of division's crimes against women and children said the investigation into the allegations could take a month and that a trial could start soon after.

Neil lived in Thailand from 2002 to early 2004, police said. Three Thai youths, aged 9, 13 and 14 at the time of their alleged abuse, contacted police after seeing Neil's photograph on television, claiming he had paid them for oral sex in 2003. The boys said the suspect showed them pornographic images on his computer at his apartment in Bangkok, and paid them each $16 to $32.

The Canadians are also interested in Neil. Before teaching in Asia, Neil had worked as a chaplain in Canada, counseling teens. British Columbia Attorney General Wally Oppal said the Royal Canadian Mounted Police had Neil under investigation in Canada for complaints "involving young boys." He did not elaborate. An RCMP spokeswoman, Constable Annie Linteau, said only that Neil was "a person of interest" but added that the force was asking Canadians with information on him to call the child-exploitation tip line. "The RCMP had received complaints here and so obviously we have an interest in what happens to him in Thailand," Oppal said. Maj. Gen. Wongkot Maneerin, deputy national police chief said Neil would "definitely" be prosecuted in Thailand. "He will have to go to Thai court first. After the case is over, then we can send him," he said.